Why do foster parents continue fostering with a system so plagued with problems and on the verge of collapse? What makes you not give up?

I hear these questions asked of foster parents all the time. We all have different reasons for doing foster care and continuing it. I believe the biggest reason is the children. The system of foster care is struggling with so, so, many problems but we have to remember the children are in the core of the system.

People make statements that they could not work with a troubled system or that they are waiting for the system to get better. These children deserve more than being disregarded because the system they live in has serious problems. You cannot wait for things to change. Things change when we decide to make the changes. The best way to change things sometimes is from the inside.

Foster parents continue fostering because they believe that children deserve a chance at life, they can change children’s lives, and some feel they are giving back. Some have seen children in need and cannot look the other way.

Foster parents cannot give up because that is giving up on the children. Knowing that you are making a difference in children’s lives keeps you going. When you get that call about a drug baby or a nine year abused girl that needs a placement that night or will go to a shelter, you cannot say no.

I do not take every placement that my agency calls me about but most of the time I will tell them if they cannot find someone to give me a call back. One of the children I adopted came into our lives this way. They called me back to say that they told CPS that we would accept the placement, so that night we had a new child. There was a lot going on in our lives at that moment so we were not really wanting to get another placement. Sometimes things work out the way they are suppose to as in this case.

A question I hear a lot is: “When are you going to stop fostering?” This is mainly because we have adopted some of our foster children. As my agency reminds me that one day my space is going to run out for foster children. I am also aware that we are parenting children that face some major challenges. I do know for sure that I will always be involved in some way with foster care. Personally, I hope every day of my life I spend involved with foster care.

I do not give up because I was blessed by foster care with wonderful blessing, my children. Every child deserves a safe, happy and loving family. We keep fighting the fight for the children that cannot fight for themselves.

Please share below the reasons that you continue being a foster parent and why you do not give up.


More reading:

Foster Care Becoming More Open to Single Fathers

Are Foster Parents Doing It for the Money?

How to Decide if Foster Care is Right For Your Family