Last weekend “Sunshine” had a softball tournament in San Antonio. It’s an hour and a half or two hours away; too far to commute to a 7:40 a.m. warm up, so we decided to stay in a hotel. This is a big deal for our family of seven, both emotionally and logistically.
We kept Friday open for errands, knowing we’d head out of town just before rush hour. We had to make a couple of stops on the way. In the discount store, my phone rang. I decided to ignore it since the three little ones are a handful in a store. Sunshine fished my phone out of my purse to see who had called.
“It’s the agency, Mom.” She looked jubilant. “Call them back!”
Against my better judgment, I did so. As predicted, all three of the the “Littles” started acting up, so I had to ask our worker to repeat herself about nine times.
It was a new baby; a brand new baby born the day before. They would want me to invite him to our home the next evening. I love infants. I am not a person who cares about sleep so infants and I get along. It might be for a day or a month; the baby would be placed for adoption but they wanted to exclude medical issues.
I talked it over with Sunshine. “I won’t get to play much, if at all, Mom. We may get knocked out of the tournament Saturday night. We can take two cars. You should say “yes.”
I said yes. We finished our shopping while I pondered the possible scenarios. When we got to the parking lot, I called our worker back and said, “Sorry, not now.”
It was a hard decision to make but in the end, I couldn’t face the thought of possibly missing my daughter’s Sunday games if they won on Saturday. I couldn’t face the thought of my family at the hotel having fun without me. I wasn’t ready to let go of my dream of this much needed weekend of relaxation and family time.
It was the right choice. The team lost in the tournie, but Sunday morning sleeping in, hotel breakfast and swimming was great too. The leisurely drive home was fantastic. Sometimes we really do need to notice when we get in that “box” of desire and remember to look after our true needs. “Not now” can be the best answer!
