I am snuggled up on the sofa with two of my favorite people. It is just that kind of day- the snow is falling and wind blowing. It is cold. So the family is reading, blogging, watching, puzzling and cooking. Everyone is at their respective ‘favorite’ activity. I can’t think of a better way to spend a long and lazy Sunday.
It’s the lazy days that get me thinking about how lucky I am to be where I am. My kids are not actually all my own, I have some on loan at this point. I am trying to work at capturing these moments in my heart because I know that some of my kids will not always be here. That is one of the hardest things of being in a foster parent role. All of the investments made in time, finances and emotional support are done fully in faith that something will be taken from my home. How hard it is to imagine what the future will bring for ‘my’ children.
I work with each of my kids to develop who they are while dealing honestly with their weaknesses. In the fostering situation, that is more difficult because the children have been in transition for so long and do not trust well. It is extremely hard to guide a child when they lack emotional stability. Every word must be chosen with care because these children are often not able to filter the comments and take away the correct message. They also lack the ability to implement changes into their lives. This is where foster parenting is tricky. As a parent, I personally want what is best for all my kids. I spend time thinking of their futures and helping them plan. While still under the transition and instability of being a foster child, some children cannot see past today- much less plan for a future.
The sun is beginning to set over the field behind my house. The evening chores will need to be completed. The kids will all have to be pulled away from their respective activity to brave the cold and care for their animals. Then all of the family will meet at the table and eat the newest edible creation that my husband made while I snuggled on the sofa. I hope that all of the kids will be able to look back on today and see it as I do- a day of self-discovery and rest, the best kind.