A child causing deliberate self-harm may be not what you thought of when you started your journey of being a foster parent. These are the behaviors that are easier for you as the parent to identify as self –harming such as head banging or banging other body parts against walls, pinching self, biting self, and pulling hair and even eyelashes. You can see these behaviors in any age child. I dealt with these behaviors with a foster child as young as a ten months old. These behaviors can be identified quickly for a foster parent and addressed.

If you foster children nine years or older, you may find yourself facing more extreme behaviors. In the beginning you may not realize what is happening because you are unaware of what to look for. Extreme behaviors you may see are cutting, burning, scalding, skin picking (to the point of bleeding), and stabbing objects in their bodies (ex: pencil, stick, nail, etc.). Sadly, children that want to harm themselves can use any object to causes harm.

Signs to be aware of that could mean you are dealing with a child that is causing harm to him or herself, you see repeated sores, a child seems to always getting hurt but they are not clear how, or you notice odd objects in their room (nails, sticks, lighter, objects used for cutting, etc.). If you find yourself realizing that something may be wrong, then you need to talk with your foster child about your concerns. Hopefully you can get your foster child to open up about their behavior. You next step needs to be making an appointment as soon as possible with a mental health professional. This is not something that will resolve itself or something that you will be able to deal with.

Self-harming is a very serious behavior, problem, or concern that needs to be dealt with immediately. When a child repeatedly causes self-harm to themselves they are at risk of suicide.

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