When you get a call concerning placement for a child or children that have been in another foster home spend sometime getting information. Ask tons of questions and think about it before you make a snap decision. One foster parent might find something unbearable with a foster child, but another foster parent finds is normal for foster care.

It can be hard get to the truth about why they are being moved sometimes. The more questions you ask the better chance you have of piecing together what is going on with this child.

When you are told that the child is being moved because she and the other children are not getting along, this could easily mean that she is being aggressive and it is become physical with the other children. Think about it, if she was not the problem then the foster parent would be asking to have a different child moved. She is too much for the inexperienced foster parent to handle. On boys, this can mean that she is trying to beat the day lights out of the foster parents, and also that other people are stepping in to handle her meaning police and psychiatric hospital stays. I know that one quite well I did it and lived to tell about it.

Through trial and lots of errors, I have found that it can be a good idea to do respite care for a few days for children coming for other foster homes. This can allow you to see a number of things: "Just how severe are their behaviors are. Will these children get along with other children in your home? How disruptive are these children going to be to your home?"

With saying all of this, there truly are foster children that do better in different homes for any number of different reasons i.e. the ages of the other children in the home, parenting styles, personalities, etc. A foster child having to move from another foster home does not mean this is not a good placement for your family. You just need to be thorough on your questions and make the right decision for your family.

Related articles at adoption.com:

Dealing with a Child's Aggression

Psychologist: Reactive Attachment Disorder