Questions and Emails From Readers

March 7th, 2008
Posted By: on Foster Care
Categories: The Questions

At this point I have become backed up with responding to comments, questions and emails. Bear with me, I hope to have everything caught in a few weeks. I will always try to address any of these things in a post since the information would also benefit others. So, please keep checking back on the foster care blog for my reply. When I reply to emails I will not give names or other information that is provided to me. Only the basic information that other readers need to follow the post will be shared. If anyone else has topics or questions that they would like addressed on this blog please, comment below or email me. Also remember that sometimes topics may need to… [more]

Facts About Biological Parents and Their Plans

January 24th, 2008
Posted By: on Foster Care

This is a reply to a comment left here concerning how I, or other foster parents would know that biological parents were not working their plans. Biological parents not working their plans are not in most cases a top secret thing from the foster parents or other people involved with the foster children. Yes, there are confidentiality rules that people not involved with the case knowing the information. No, for the record I know this information because I hear it from the biological parents mouths as do most other foster parents. Case assessments and/or case plans happen every 6 months (maybe different time table in other states). Everyone involved with foster children can be part of this meeting, yes including the foster parents. This meeting can be attended… [more]

What Happens if Biological Parents Don’t Work Their Plan?

January 14th, 2008
Posted By: on Foster Care
Categories: The Questions

This is one question that I have been asked in an email and also hear from time to time. I will start with what should happen. Soon, after the children are placed into foster care the biological parents are given a service plan. Please remember, things will differ somewhat state to state or within the states things can also be different. The biological parents may also have different plans or individual areas that they may need to work on. They are given a year to work their plan, but with saying that, they also are suppose to be showing progress that they are working on their plan. The goal is that biological parents should have their plan worked within 12 months, so that… [more]

To Be Part of a Foster Family or Not to Be

November 5th, 2007
Posted By: on Foster Care
Categories: The Questions

A comment left here got me to thinking about peoples’ thoughts and opinions on foster homes. On one hand it is believed that foster children should be treated as the foster parents own children are. Then before you know it you are told things should be different for foster children, and at times, different with each foster child. This has left me believing that most people (including biological parents) do not begin to understand or have a clear picture of how things should work in a foster home. Foster children come in a foster home that is a functioning home with rules, chores, routines, other children, responsibilities, and structure which all of these things are needed for a working, safe, loving… [more]

Foster Parents – Myth versus Reality

September 3rd, 2007
Posted By: on Foster Care
Categories: The Questions

I have never claimed that all biological parents are bad parents, or abuse their children. I myself am also a biological parent. I know a ton of biological parents that are great parents that do not abuse or neglect their children. First, let me clear this up. I am not against biological parents. I am against parents that do abuse or neglect their children and that make the choice to place themselves before their children. I have written blogs when asked questions, and for help, by biological parents that hoped to get their children back. I did this because I was actually trying to help them because they asked me to help them. I have never supported any foster parent that harms… [more]

A Mother’s Love

August 21st, 2007
Posted By: on Foster Care
Categories: The Questions

I have heard that I do not understand the term, a mother’s love, being used when I have talked about biological mothers abusing or neglecting their children. As a foster parent, I do get this thrown in my face quite a lot from biological families and others. Is the abuse that foster children suffer in the name of a mother’s love? A child beaten to the point of breaking bones An 8 month old baby accidentally ingested meth and other drugs A 21 month old baby battered and beaten to death by two men in mom’s life Children being left home alone for days to care for themselves Children living in drug environments with violence, abuse (including sexual), or taken to a drug… [more]

Foster Parents Are Not the Problem

July 31st, 2007
Posted By: on Foster Care
Categories: The Questions

I will be addressing statements (below is the first one) that have been left in comments on a few of my blogs. "foster parent" goodie, two-shoe roles as the "resucer", the "if it wasn't for me", or "I saved you from the abuse of your parent(s)", attention seeking, control needing, "look at me", requiring people in this sad world It's all about "ME", meaning, the person, that gets what he/she wants. In this case, becoming, "recusers", for poor little amy or john. You all are just as selfish as a parent that do not get their self as you say "together". Foster parents do not hope for more children to come into the foster care system to benefit themselves or anybody else. Truthfully, most… [more]

Foster Children Being Removed

July 31st, 2007
Posted By: on Foster Care
Categories: The Questions

I will be addressing statements (below is the first one) that have been left in comments on a few of my blogs. “Always know some parent(s) want their children, at birth, and before and after being kidnapped by the state for their "power seeking, memorable souls".” Foster children are not removed from their biological parents on a whim. Caseworkers are not driving around trolling the streets looking for children to place into foster care to keep their job and to fill up foster homes. Complaints are made by anyone (including the biological family members which does happen a lot, doctors, school employees, friends, general public, the lady at the grocery store, etc.) to the police department, abuse hotline, or local child welfare office. I… [more]

Do Foster Parents Start Out Only to Adopt?

July 25th, 2007
Posted By: on Foster Care
Categories: The Questions

For the most part, foster parents decide to foster to help children in need. Some foster parents know going in that they want to adopt, and that may be the only reason they have chosen to foster. Some foster parents are blessed to adopt more children. Some people are concerned that foster parents are fostering in the hopes to adopt a child are not looking at what is best for the children. When the truth is, that in some situations (referred to as legal risk or at risk placement) the caseworkers will look for a foster to adopt placement for the foster children if it looks like the children will be placed up for adoption. Having only one placement for the foster children is what is… [more]

Is Parenting a Right or a Privilege?

June 24th, 2007
Posted By: on Foster Care

Children living in foster care is suppose to be a temporary situation. There are cases where children spend years living in foster care. Should this concern us for a number of reasons? The biological parents deserve time to get their lives together so they can get their children back from foster care. This is a point that most of us can agree with. Should there be a time frame that the courts have to follow? Why should parents get years to decide to be responsible parents? Being a parent is not about convenience. It should be about the children. As a parent you must have a commitment to the children that you have been blessed with. Children do not ask to be born… [more]