Learning What it Means to be Part of a Professional Team

August 24th, 2011
Posted By: on Foster Care

A couple of years ago, we had a sweet little boy in our home.  I'll call him Ricky.  He was only 16 months old, and it was his first removal.  He had allegedly been harmed by his mother's boyfriend. He was my first CPS case, so when it was time to take him to his first family visit, I was nervous.  The waiting room was completely full of people there on other state business, but I quickly picked out his parents, awkwardly sitting together and talking quietly.  It was winter and I was worried about all the coughing in the room, so I took him to an isolated corner to wait until called. The spot I chose to wait happened to be close to the window where the CPS visit check in… [more]

Most of the Time

December 29th, 2010
Posted By: on Foster Care

1207834_yellow_watchI absolutely love being a foster mom...most of the time. I work with a group of caring, admirable caseworkers...most of the time. My plan is to keep doing foster care until the day I die...most of the time. Today is not a "most of the time" day. I want to be done! I want to walk away from all of it and never look back. After all, I have done my part, haven't I? We have been foster parents for over 11 years to over 40 children. I have had birth parents call me horrible names, caseworkers go behind my back and act unprofessionally, and kids who have ensured I have nothing of value left to break in my house. I can walk… [more]

An Overnight Visit With Previous Foster Child

June 23rd, 2008

Three weeks ago our five year old foster daughter returned home to her birthmother. We have spent the 16 months of parenting her developing a strong relationship with her birth family. Not just developing a relationship with her parents, buts aunts, uncles, significant others, and grandparents as well. We worked on building this relationship for several reasons. First, we had parented this child for nearly a year when she was one and two years old. Therefore, we love her, we have known her for most of her life, and she feels like a member of our family. In addition, we adopted her 10-year-old birth cousin with whom she had lived as sisters. Her return home was very difficult for her cousin to accept. However, we promised… [more]

One Woman Grieves a Lost Child Another Woman Celebrates on Mother’s Day

May 6th, 2008

Foster parents rejoice when a new child is placed in their home. With Mother’s Day approaching, a woman might feel especially blessed to have a new child placed in her home. After all, that is why they went through weeks of training and mounds of paperwork. Many foster parents have an ultimate goal of adoption and hope that a child will be able to stay forever. Initially, when a child arrives as an emergency placement no one is sure which direction the case will take. Will the child go home or will parental rights be terminated allowing the child to be adopted. The arrival of a child always builds up hope for those wanting to adopt that this child might be the one. The foster family… [more]

Sex Offenders – Parenting

February 7th, 2008
Posted By: on Foster Care
Categories: Biological Parents

The numbers of sex offenders continue to grow in our country. It was reported the other day on television that more women are becoming sex offenders. Teachers and other women are having sexual relations with teenage boys. You may be asking what does this have to do with foster care? In Texas, a mother of two small children (age: 4 and 5) was convicted of sexual assault. She was sentenced to 23 years in prison. The children have been in foster care since August 2006. The biological father is in California and was represented by an attorney. Other family members are unwilling to take the children. CPS has asked a judge to terminate the children’s parental rights. The truth is, the biological… [more]

Foster Care – Growing Problem of Drugs

January 30th, 2008
Posted By: on Foster Care

Drugs Impacting the Foster Care System States continue to struggle with the number of foster children in care because of drugs. In Nebraska nearly 2 out of 5 foster children in foster care are there because their biological parents are addicted to methamphetamine. In Georgetown, Texas CPS says that more than half of foster children are in care due to drug and alcohol problems. Drug abuse (“meth” being the prevalent one) has caused eighty percent of foster children to come into care in Idaho. Oregon is facing ninety percent of foster children in care because of their biological parent’s drug abuse. In Payson, Arizona of 2007 ninety-five percent of the foster children were in care due to “meth”. What… [more]

Drugs Impacting the Foster Care System

January 30th, 2008
Posted By: on Foster Care

The numbers of children in foster care are continuing to rise in this country because of the effects that “meth” and other drugs have seemed to have on the lives that they touch. Instead of numbers of foster placements involved with drugs getting better they seem to be skyrocketing. With drugs continuing to be a major problem of our society, the picture of foster care continues to become bleaker every day. I have written about the effect of drugs to the foster care system and the damage that it does to the children in the past. This caused some people to take exception with what I wrote. I did receive emails explaining drug addiction and how I needed to take that into account… [more]

Foster Care: Empathy and Reality – Coping

July 23rd, 2007
Posted By: on Foster Care

Foster Care: Empathy and Reality (continued) So, it came to the point, I stop trying to involve them in what was happening in their daughter’s life. What was truly heartbreaking was that they did not ask about her accomplishments or happeings in her life. I did still have empathy but I also realized that they had to want to change. People have to see the problems to change and the majority of biological parents do not see it. A lot of these parents are living and parenting the only way they know how. Given the opportunity to change for the sake of their children they do not. This is a choice that the parents are making and cannot be viewed as an excuse for them… [more]

Foster Care: Empathy and Reality

July 23rd, 2007
Posted By: on Foster Care

In a the blog “Who Pays the Price?” a question was brought up having empathy and understanding for the birth or biological parents that have children in foster care or lost them to the system. The reality of what these children have endured is a lot to deal with for them and the foster parents. I think there is a difference in empathy for the birth parents and disliking them, than the reality of some foster children’s lives, abuse, lack of concern, abandonment, etc. I believe most foster parents have empathy for the biological parents even when these same people do not show their own children empathy. These children will live with a life long impact to their lives because of choices made by an adult… [more]

Foster Parents Versus Biological Parents

July 22nd, 2007
Posted By: on Foster Care

Some people think or believe that foster parents are waiting, hoping, praying that the biological parents mess up or choose not to follow their plan to get their children back. If this was the case, then foster parents would not be willing to take foster children short term (2 or 3 weeks) or until kinship placement is worked out. For the most part, I believe most foster parents do it for the children. Yes, I do know there are a few bad ones that do it for the money. I would think there would be a more involved way to help biological parents with counseling, teaching parenting classes, etc. if that was your goal. Child welfare's goal is to assist the parents in receiving the help they need and… [more]