Books and Trainings

July 8th, 2011
Posted By: on Foster Care

babyinbasket-clipart-graphicsfairy007Our social worker came yesterday for our quarterly review.  I have almost completed my training hours this year -- we only lack two hours.  Nonetheless, I signed up to take the  Karyn Purvis inspired course, "Trauma-Informed Care." I am really excited about this course for one simple reason:  I think most kids who come into the foster system have experienced trauma.  In some ways, it's blindingly obvious.  We are born to parents whom we are biologically programmed to love and to depend upon.  When that bond is broken, for any reason, that in itself is trauma.  Of course they are talking about different trauma than this -- but just the act of removal would… [more]

Have You Heard a Child Say, “Too Many People Love Me?” Visiting Former Foster Children

July 10th, 2008

Do you ever remember a child saying, “Too many people love me?” Have you ever heard an epitaph that read, “Too many people loved me during my life?” Did you ever hear, “I spent too much time with people I loved?” Of course not, what a wonderful thing it is to know there are people who love you and care about you. Knowing there is someone you can call in any crisis gives you a sense of inner security. Children in foster care usually live with broken attachments. In their world, people come and then go, never to be seen again. It must be confusing to hear someone say, “I love you,” and then disappear forever. That is why I have chosen to remain in… [more]

Support Network – Doctors

January 28th, 2008
Posted By: on Foster Care
Categories: Support System

Finding a doctor willing to provide care for your foster children can be a challenge. A lot of doctors do not take Medicaid so this limits your choices, or they only have a certain number of Medicaid patients they see. If you have a doctor that your children or your family sees check with them to see if they would be willing to see your foster children even if they say they are closed to new Medicaid patients. My foster children were taken as my children since my doctor had been seeing my daughter for a few years. When we moved last year there was not a pediatrician in our small town which made me uneasy since my children have medical issues and other… [more]

Help When There Is Nobody Willing To Help

January 27th, 2008
Posted By: on Foster Care
Categories: Support System

Reader xxsurroundedbyxy has asked what you can do when you have no support. I will share my ideas about finding help with foster children when family or friends are not an option. Please, share your thoughts, ideas or experiences below to help out other foster parents. Some foster parents do not have family or friends willing to help out with foster children for any number of reasons. This can make things rough for you and add to your stress level. I will share some ideas and options to look at when you are trying to find someone to help out with your foster children. Please read this carefully: First, every state and agency will have their own laws and guidelines to… [more]

Seeking a Support System and Helping with Your Foster Children

January 27th, 2008
Posted By: on Foster Care
Categories: Support System

What to do when you do not have the built-in support system with your decision to do foster care? First, every state and agency will have their own laws and guidelines to meet, so check with both before doing anything. The reality is that it was your decision to become a foster parent and not that of your family or friends. When foster children are placed into the mix of things it can stress others out. Some people have an image or a distorted idea of foster children being juvenile delinquents, etc. that you may have to overcome. Respite care is where you pay a person to provide care for your foster children, more or less a babysitter. The biggie is that a respite… [more]

Who Finds the Support System and Resources for Foster Children?

January 26th, 2008
Posted By: on Foster Care
Categories: Support System

While I have talked about foster parents needing a support system, we also have to have an ongoing support system for any foster children that come into our home. The support system for your foster children will continue to grow and develop as you foster. I here oh, so often that Child Welfare is not assisting the foster parent with issues they are having or helping get foster children the care they need. While I totally believe that they should be the ones to assist the foster parents and children that is not what is happening on a regular basis in most cases. So, this falls upon the shoulders of the foster parents to take care of. The most important thing to… [more]

Foster Parents Need a Support System

January 25th, 2008
Posted By: on Foster Care

This is something that every foster parent needs to manage the stress and challenges that comes along with being a foster parent. When I first started fostering, I did not realize how important and what a necessity this is. While most of us have the family members and friends that are our normal daily life support system, we also need this with being a foster parent. This means that your daily support system will need to understand some basics of foster children and be open about children that may have issues or behaviors. Truthfully not every family member or friend will understand the foster children and everything that comes along with them. This can lead to people questioning you parenting style… [more]