Today, we got our National Adoption Day packet for our adoption, so we are very excited. This year we will be spending National Adoption Day with other families (like a couple of hundred) with the great honor of adopting a child and parenting through adoption.

This is a big day in foster care. A number of foster children are adopted on this day as a true celebration instead of the traditional legal courthouse. In most cases, for foster children that are adopted on this day, the legal services are provided pro bono, which is a great blessing for foster parents. You will still... more

Abuse is a major component of the foster care system. The abuse that some of these suffer will be carried with them throughout their lives. While other foster children manage to work through the trauma of their abuse, some children have been so severely damaged by the abuse they endured. They may never recover, or spend their lives struggling with major issues.

When I first became a foster parent, I could not understand how or even why caseworkers, therapist, etc. did not know what abuse the child suffered or to the extent of the abuse. It is common after accepting a foster... more

This can be quite a mix for dealing with behaviors. A large number of foster children do not have the traditional Halloween with customs, pumpkins, and trick or treat. Young foster children that I have parented were very confused, scared and unsure of everything. While I think they somewhat enjoyed the experience but they were withdrawal and quite.

A few children only went to a few houses to trick or treat then went home with me to hand out candy while my husband took the other ones on. The realty is that some children have great difficulties with the whole experience and it... more

Survival Skills with Your Foster Children – Stealing

I believe stealing is one of the hardest habits to break. I have made improvements with foster children over time with stealing, but it is still there. While I do understand that for the most part their stealing is a learned behavior or that they had to steal food for survival, it is something that foster parents should not overlook.

This is a criminal behavior that the foster child must learn is wrong... more

This is something that is somewhat common in foster care. Stealing is taking anything that does not belong to you (in my opinion). I personally have dealt with this a lot in foster care. In my house in no way is stealing excused even with a foster child. If you steal anything you will face and accept the consequences in my home.

Children coming into foster care can be stealing for any number of reasons. I had one teen boy that was put in the position to steal food and then in time there was not a limit to what he would steal. His biological mother started stealing things to... more

Every foster child and even babies that I have fostered had some type of survival skills at different levels. It all depends on the type of abuse or neglect (in a lot of cases, the child suffers both) that the child suffered, along with how long she suffered. If these children had not developed these skills they would not have survived or would have been severely damaged. We all know there are children that have been so severely damaged that they never recover.

Infants and toddlers learn to eat as much as they can, when they can, since most do not eat on a regular basis. It... more

As foster parents we have to take a step back every now and then to realize that foster children for the most part have many more complex issues than other children leaving them at a disadvantage. It is easy to think that in time that a foster child that struggles with food issues will realize that there will always be food for her. The truth is that the issues that most foster children struggle with come from their lifetime of learning how to survive.

For these children it was not a choice of good or bad behaviors it is all about survival. These children have to learn... more

Cool autumn days are here with crisp autumn nights which are a nice change. In foster care, things change drastically in the autumn. Getting foster children settled back into school when school has never been an important part of their life is a huge chore. Their issues with school leads to the foster parent spending a lot of time on the phone with school officials, parent conferences, ARD meeting (special ed. meeting), etc.

In foster care, the number of foster children coming into care tends to increase during the autumn and holidays. Some foster homes may take in... more

One of the biggest struggles I have with foster care is finding psychiatrists or other mental healthcare for foster children. Finding a mental healthcare person that takes Medicaid can be a chore in it’s self. I have also learned that one psychiatrist most likely will not work with all of your foster children or they may only work with set ages. Foster parents need to be prepared for a placement that may have some mental health issues. Trying to manage finding help while a foster child or the family is having a crisis is only going to make a difficult situation that much more difficult.... more

Stress of Foster Care on a Marriage

Stress of Foster Care on a Marriage - Reality

I have talked about the amount of stress that foster parents deal with on a daily basis, now I want to talk about how not to let the stress take over marriage. It is so easy to get caught up in all the stress and slowly it starts to affect your life, especially your marriage. I have also talked... more