The big thing for us this Easter was adding some new family members, in the form of Parakeets. So, we didn’t get into the whole egg coloring. Jessica went to a friend’s house and was able to do that with them. It’s tough, since Ronni is Jewish and I am not really into the Easter holiday.

Jessica had expressed an interest in Easter egg hunting, but she is too old for all of the Easter activities we had seen advertised in the paper. This was our first Easter together as a family, and there was a lot of pressure to make it a special occasion. We came up with our own idea of how... more

We went to Petsmart yesterday to get some Easter Budgies. It wasn’t an impulse purchase, but a planned trip to get some new friends for our parakeet, Sugar, who lost her mate a little while ago. She has been very lonely lately, and we decided to get her some friends. We found two great little parakeets that are about five months old, and they were already friends.

We debated what to call them, and decided on Abundance and Prosperity. We had considered things that would go good with Sugar, but high fructose corn syrup and cinnamon didn’t cut it. Neither did nutrasweet nor nutmeg. Prosperity and Abundance are doing well in their new home, despite having had their wings clipped and... more

Continuing on with the subject of therapy, and how it relates to our newly formed family. Foster children and children adopted from foster care have come from some pretty unstable and chaotic family backgrounds. What appears "normal" to us is not for them. When they experience love from us as the foster and/or adoptive parents, it doesn’t compute.

As Deborah Hage says in her article on Antecedents to Lying and Teaching the Truth,

"His mother says, "I love you" and follows that up with a safe home,... more

Well, it’s another Sunday. A day to relax and unwind, and prepare for the week ahead. This is what we, as parents, need. It is not, however, what the kid needs. She needs to be with friends or outside running around and burning off some energy. Otherwise, by this evening she’ll be wired.

We met with yet another therapist, as a family, in the hopes of finally finding someone that can actually help us, and J. What we got instead was the “oh, you poor foster kid” therapist type. Don’t these therapists pay attention in therapy class, when they go over who is in charge of the session?... more

May is quickly approaching, and it is National Foster Care Month. In recognition of children in foster care and of the foster parents that care for them, here are some things that you can do in your local community to help raise awareness:

Tell youth that you know or work with, about Casey Family Programs and the Orphan Foundation of America. These two organizations have many resources for foster youth, including scholarship opportunities and lifeskills programs.

Let members of your community know about ways they can help support youth in foster care. If we all do a little bit, we can make a big change.

Contact... more

I was thinking of writing about how to make changes in the foster care system to make things easier for the children and the foster parents. Until we can figure out a better way to deal with the overloaded caseworkers and therapists, I think we should provide all the support we can to the foster parents and the children.

I’m just going to throw out some ideas here, and I’d like to know what you think. Foster children say repeatedly that they want to be treated like they are part of the family. But, what does this mean, exactly, since each family is different?

I propose that we define “family” as it pertains to a foster family, and then make it part of the licensing requirement... more

Here are some stories having to do with foster care, that were in the news recently. I’d also like to remind all of you about The National Day of Hope tomorrow. Don’t forget to get your three-wick candle and light it in remembrance of the three children that die each day due to child abuse.

The Deficit Reduction Act of 2005 includes new provisions to improve the juvenile and family courts, reflecting several of the Pew Commission's major court recommendations. These new improvements will help courts track... more

Reprinted with permission.

Chapin Hall has recently conducted the largest study to date of youth who run away from out-of-home placements in an effort to understand the trends, demographics and reasons behind this phenomenon. Running away from foster care exposes youth to grave risks and prevents them from receiving needed educational and treatment services. This information, presented in an issue brief titled Youth Who Run Away from Out-of Home Care, may better protect youth by helping child welfare agencies prevent children from running... more

One of the services that I mentioned that we are going to provide at The Transitional Life Center is mental health services. There have been many studies done that show that foster children need better access to these services. A recent study done by Casey Family Programs, Harvard Medical School, the Washington Office of Children’s Administration Research and the Oregon Department of Human Services shows that rates of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)... more

Continuing on with the dependency process, the next step is the settlement conference, or mediation. Mediation is an alternative to trial. At this point, all the parties meet and can possibly agree on how to progress, if everyone cooperates and tries to work toward a solution.

Not everybody has to agree in the beginning, but since there is now more information available about the parties involved, there can be more meaningful discussions of the issues at hand. Any thing that is talked about in mediation is strictly confidential, and many of the discussions will be very emotional.... more